Stories of Humanity is launching soon. It’s a podcast featuring interviews with individuals in pursuit of meaning.
My boyfriend asked me, over a bowl of ramen earlier this month, about my plans for the podcast and what I hope to achieve by hosting it.
I want to help people find reasons to live. Listening to others talking about what is meaningful to them is a good place to find ideas for new things to be explored, tried or considered, as options, while searching for meaning, purpose or simply choosing to push through another day.
What inspired this?
Like many others, I’ve experienced days where I lost my will to live or didn’t see the point in going forward. This isn’t strange or unusual, by any means.
Many are often surprised when someone ends their life, but what is far more surprising – given the amount of suffering and bleakness we experience throughout our lives – is that we don’t all choose to give up the following day.
In any case, there is still hope even when we cannot see it. Hope may remain unseen for a long time, but if we hold on long enough it will reveal itself, one day.
Despair visits all, sooner or later. Hang on long enough to make it through the other side once and you will learn that you’re capable of facing it again, should the need arise.
That first time is hardest, because once someone experiences the loss and absence of meaning, hope, belief and positivity, one doesn’t know whether they will ever return or be felt again.
One is left suffering with the painful questions, “is it always going to hurt and feel like this? Can or will this ever change? Why should I try or keep going?”
Nihilism begins whispering there isn’t any point in trying, that nothing matters and everything is meaningless. These thoughts seep into your mind and heart, slowly poisoning you, draining your strength, energy and motivation.
At that point you lost your joy, peace and interest in life. Unable to find rest or refuge, at each turn, your thoughts eventually turn to an escape or end.
Substances or activities may temporarily distract us or alleviate that pain, but the suffering returns. Often, with vengeance. Certain people seek revenge, others seek to only hurt themselves, yet commonly desire an end. The end.
It doesn’t need to end that way.
People continue changing and growing throughout their lives and this means, at times, some parts of us need to die, be torn down and rebuilt. This allows us to further grow and develop.
Plants lose dried leaves and dead wood; some animals lose limbs and regenerate them, caterpillars dissolve away (that has to be painful) to completely restructure into new beings called butterflies; and foolishly naive and optimistic humans get abused and taken advantage of, until we realize, like the constantly changing cells in our bodies, we need to let those parts of us die, cycle out and be replaced with a new version – in this case, one equipped with a healthy dose of skepticism.
It’s not fun, but we tear down and rebuild those old parts of us that no longer work – and we call them growing pains.
Life is painful. We grow, adapt, improve and learn to reduce unnecessary suffering. The suffering that remains, we can bear and face in our pursuit of meaning.
Identify your meaning. Pursue and maximize both its presence and the time that you’re spending with it in your day-to-day life. That will give you the strength and purpose to endure the suffering of life.
This will be your reason to wake and rise from your bed each day. It will serve as your motivation in mustering the effort to face the suffering life continues throwing at you.
You will find purpose in this. Yet, there’s more.
Now you know something many others don’t. You experienced despair, were lost in its hell and managed to emerge from the tunnel on the other side. You know it is possible, but there are still others who don’t and they need to hear your story.
If nothing else calls out to you, in your nights of despair, let it be this; rise and stand up for the hundreds, thousands and millions of people who are in pain, like you, at this very moment.
There is meaning to be found in sharing your pain and story, helping others realize they are not alone. We are all suffering, but we can’t see it and often forget that once we are isolated and locked away in our rooms or other hiding places.
Remember, in those moments, all those countless others suffering at the same time, just like you. They feel and think they are alone in this. As do you.
And yet we aren’t.
We are all suffering and need each other. This is how we are going to get through this, by helping support one another. You need them and they need you.
Who else can better understand their pain than another going through it? Use your experiences. Teach them to use theirs.
You don’t need to know what you’re doing. I have no idea what I’m doing a lot of the time, but I’ll be damned if I don’t sit up and at least try doing something.
Even when doing something badly, it’s better than not doing anything at all. Something is better than nothing. It doesn’t matter if you’re awkward, pathetic, anxious, stutter, slow to speak or can’t find your words, stumble, have a disability, are nervously afraid, make a mess of things, don’t have talent, don’t finish what you start, people discourage you in any capacity or think that you’re silly for trying, even if you aren’t a qualified expert.
The truth is people are dying right now. And some of them are doing it far away from the experts, the talented, the stars and those who know exactly what they’re doing. All they have is you.
So what will you do?
Knowing that, I’m ready to make as many mistakes as I’ll end up making in the process of trying to help them. Learn how to use discernment, as some people try manipulating others under a guise of needing help when they, in fact, are preying on them, equip myself with as much knowledge as I can along the way and keep the conversation going.
Who wants to join me?
The Point of Meaning 